How My Inner Victim Thinks it is More Powerful Than God

​My inner victim thinks that it knows everything. What I need, what I want, what must happen what must never happen. Really?? Why yes, of course it does. Just ask it. It knows what is best for me. It knows what I want. It calls the shots in my life. My inner victim thinks it has everything under control. My inner victim thinks it knows the meaning of everything that happens happened and ever will happen to me. My inner victim compensates for its own insecurity with a feigned sense of security designed to make me feel safe. When I rest my consciousness into that I feel alright for a few moments only to go back to feeling awful.
 
At this point I have a choice. I can keep my attention on my inner victim or I can keep my attention on God. I, like everyone, am a child of God. It’s funny; I have less of a sense of “security” when my attention is with God. However, this lack of security is somehow pleasantly different.  When I reflect on my life, I can see that what I thought was right for me actually wasn’t. I am where I am in my life and can see that while it isn’t anything like I would have imagined, I can see that it I am far better off than if I were ‘calling the shots.’ Something has been running my life far better than I ever could. That something is God. As a child of the creator of all that is, I have access to God’s higher wisdom, provided that I can see past my inner victim long enough to gain access to it. I can allow myself to not feel so pressured that everything in life is all up to me and only me. I have a co-creator who has always had my back and continues to have my back, even if I don’t think so. When I live with this realization, I feel a sense of peace far greater than what my inner victim could ever offer. When I forget this idea, I panic. I have lived long enough with panic, so I will choose God and the peace that comes with it.
©2018 Michael Morris, MA LLP
Totality, LLC